implicit art

I’ve been emailing with my sister, Samantha, a little bit lately. She’s such a
honey, and b/c we live very different lives, I often forget how similar we are.
We both live in the future, I think - a whole lot of what-if’s, but asked about
the present, instead of the past. This is not necessarily a bad thing, I reckon,
but can make life more stressful. Last night Nicole and I went out with a fellow
American who lives in our building and teaches at Wits
(small world). He got me to thinking about going back to school again, for a PhD.
Earlier in the week, Katherine
(alias Kaki) inspired me
(indirectly - just by my checking out her
site) to try and submit more proposals, for new art projects, to competitions
and festivals. Jonah got
me re-excited about an ongoing art series of cut-outs last week. Ross
gets me hot for music; Luana makes me want to write and perform; often, I wonder
if I shouldn’t just devote more time to teaching, or learning, or political activism
(as if these aren’t implied in the former time-consumption projects; what a choice
of word! time-consumption)… etc. It’s hard to make the
decisions of how to spend your time; I find myself dreaming about how I might
spend it better, more and more frequently as of late, instead of actually using
it. Do
you ever feel that way? Don’t get me wrong; I think this is a good thing to
know about myself. I just struggle with what to do about it. Maybe my sister knows;
probably not. it’s something. Life’s pretty good though, right?